WARNING This page contains classified information that no one can lay their eyes on, with the exception being only an animal from the raccoon, toad and groundhog family, the endangered Ractoadhog and anything else that's as ugly as you.
In 2009, a crack commando was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he didn't commit. This man promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Ann Arbor underground. Today, still wanted by the government he survives as a soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him....maybe you can hire the Shane!!!!!!!
Many refer to me as "the chosen one", "the face of perfection", and "master briggs". But we're bros, so feel free to call me Pike. Being one of humanity's great minds, I have devised a carefully formulated categorizing system to separate the stages of human life. It has 4 basic categories: Pimpin', Ballin', Trippin', and Chillin'. I would explain the complex details of it, but I doubt your stubborn mortal brains could understand it. Along with my godly intelligence, I spend my free time chilin' listening to T-Swiddy and watching Netflix. I have a strict No-exersize policy.